Saturday, Oct 28, 2023

Zedan Saheer

My resort to any form of psychological feeling of extreme low was over-eating.

The underlying idea was extreme dopamine through good junk of food.

The last 6 months of my life was a roller coaster of a ride.

The result?

Well growing up as a non resident Indian in the land of Saudi Arabia, Food was a defined luxury reaching quality of all peaks.

It was very sure that my kick of dopamine, Handling various breakdowns was to simply go out and stay all day all night over- consuming junk.

The result was very obvious, You can guess?

• Oversleeping
• Overeating
• Obese/Overweight
• Sedentary lifestyle

I made myself a recipe for failure in the first 6 months of 2023.

I wanted a change, I wanted to escape my stagnant life.

I wanted to question my inner-self.

I always knew the dopamine rush I kept choosing over helped me eventually forget what ever happened to me at life this whole year.

It was a straight journey downhill to simply kill my little potential to become who I really wanted.

As much as this writing sounds silly and easy, It was a torment going through the phase of immense lack of self control or will power.

You hate yourself everyday feeling incapable of action, But deep down you trust yourself, you’ll come out of everything.

That changed me.

Living near my parents, Not really struggling despite quitting my job or getting my life fallen apart actually was the epitome of comfort.

I realised quickly this was the root of all the problems I’ve been encountering day to day.

The moment you become accustomed to extreme dopamine rush by any means, You become sort of ineffective towards your own discipline.

You keep following your desire with no real will power to put yourself outside the average life.

This thought drove insane as I slept everyday at midnight after plenty of junk consumption, Living life again like a party head.

I wanted change, I wanted it right now. I just wanted to move out of everything.

The country, My circle, The surroundings.

I knew I was living possibly the most unhealthy lifestyle, So I chose the change my body had sought all these months

I flew back to India, I have been planning waiting anticipating for this trip back all the days prior to the trip.

To build a new personality!

That’s exactly what I did, I flew back with a thought of burning all the bridges.

I knew it was a heck of a deal to fix my life altogether so I took step by step moves to fix every broken window of this abandoned building called my life.

First it was controlling the dopamine.

It’s been a month or so since I left the whole zone of comfort and consciously chose discomfort and solitude.

I isolated myself to win myself back to my true potential.

Even though I feel entitled to be able to make such changes, I acknowledged my unfair advantages.

I made proper use of my instincts to understand what is going wrong.

I feel like a different person now, I’m in my zone. I’m writing content everyday. I’m getting back to the phases of life I’ve always wanted to be in.

I’m mentally doing much more calmly and thinking at depth.

In a few weeks, I joined the gym and replaced the over eating loop with working out.

I restricted my eating habits strictly in ways that could help me become agile.

I feel a lot lighter and moving faster.

I feel I’m in my lane now, And this is happiness to me.

The point of this thread was to convey that success emerges from a state of discomfort.

It comes from the conscious mind’s wise choices to sacrifice whatever it takes to get somewhere better.

I don’t have a story of rags to riches, I haven’t seen much of suffering throughout my life and was born into comfort.

But I realised my unfair advantage, The blessings and decided to not misuse it.

I’m grateful, I decided to be an average kid who just took a different path..